25 October 2013

Terrible tourists - not happy in Narita

Now for some airport complaints:

1. Sino-tourists in the duty free.  The nouveau riche, in great Beverly Hillbillies fashion, are moving out in pestilent hordes, defacing Egyptian monuments, changing babies shiatty diapers on newspapers in airport thoroughfares, and spitting to the point where the Ministry of Tourism has made jingles to educate them...  In my experience earlier this month, one guy was pointing at something to his family and talking SO LOUD.  These commies are the true gaijin.  So his pointer finger was right next to my face and I shoved it down away from my head.

2. Chinese people standing in BOTH lanes on the moving walkway.  I was in a hurry and jumped over their boxes and crap in between the people like Knight Rider using Turbo Boost.

3. Fat Americans.  Loud screaming gaijin brats in the sushi-go-round at Narita.

4. Dirty smoking areas.  I watched a Japanese lady cleaning the smoke pit at Narita with a little brush, here I see spilled soda and garbage all over.  Meanwhile, in the U.S., if you're lucky enough to find one, it's soiled, sticky, sundered and sullen.  My nose bled all over that small room, Customs, and I walked around with a tissue stuffed up my nose covered in crimson blood, which had previously ejected from my nose dragging several inches worth of entrails quite spectacularly in the mens' room. 

I enjoyed basking in the cleanliess and good order.  And I love killing time in airports, but travel is not really glamourous these days.  Bring plenty of nasal spray to survive the air on the plane, earplugs for the screaming kids, and intolerance for rude tourists. 

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