I love radio as a medium. I love fishing for interesting things on the airwaves, fishing for signals far and near. I always thought the nationally broadcast Coast to Coast was middle-of-the-night E.T./conspiracist tuning (but I don't have an issue with that). Although I'm not an enthusiast, when I have tuned in, I've occasionally enjoyed guests reasoning with wisdom and discernment on human behavior - not just fluff or whipped topping - and resonating with truth. "Peeling back the onion" is a clever way to describe this. Using one's own intuition, I believe it's important to "hit record" and hold onto these words and hear them again. Like horoscopes, you start out with a message with broad general appeal ("You are good." "You be careful." etc.) and deduce its personal meaning to your station in life, its worth to you in the way you carry on.
Case in point today: Dr. Les Carter. I liked this clinician's way of analyzing aspects of anger and fear, both some of the most powerful of human emotions, and an important charge at the end.
On conflict and respect: "Anger creates more disrespect: you don't end up getting what you want for expressing your anger, you [risk] an opportunity of what you want for more disrespect, which keeps anger alive... [and you have a] whole cycle going of unhealthy anger."
"Suppose you're in a relationship, and somebody displays some disrespect for you, there are healthy ways you can respond to that. Anger can work on your behalf. Example: You can stand up for what you believe is right in that, but you can do it in such a way that shows dignity and the worth toward that other individual, as you stand your ground and treat that other individual with genuine goodness, there's the good chance that that the other’s vision is going to diminish some of the things coming your way, and you don't perpetuate ugly behavior."
"Is there a measurable physiological response when you get angry?"
On fear: "What’s the emotion that drives pretenses? It’s very easy. Fear! The person who lives with pretenses is thinking, 'Well I’m threatened by the possibility of being seen threatened, of being seen as something other than wonderful. So, I’ve gotta keep up these false fronts because it’d be awful of people made a wrong interpretation of me.' The link to anger saw something else. Certainly the individual that drops the fear and learns to have a certain inner trust you know, it’s o.k.: To be what I am. Sometimes you’ll find that - 'I’m a mixed bag.' Sometimes I make wise decisions, sometimes I don’t. Drop the pretenses and learn to live without the fear. That’s where emotional cleanness starts to occur."
"There's nothing wrong with thinking, 'I’m a good guy who tries to go to work and help people.'"
"If you have a certain giftedness, I believe it’s wrong to hold that back. To not live in a forward way without using that gift in a forward way is not making good use of the life that’s been given you."
"Clara talked about pretenses – trying to pretend much more than you really are – you don’t have flaws, weaknesses or fears. There are lots of things you can do with a nice, moderate level of self-identity, not saying 'My underarms don’t stink, etc.'" :)
"Admit and acknowledge when you don’t have good moments!"
"Suppose you're in a relationship, and somebody displays some disrespect for you, there are healthy ways you can respond to that. Anger can work on your behalf. Example: You can stand up for what you believe is right in that, but you can do it in such a way that shows dignity and the worth toward that other individual, as you stand your ground and treat that other individual with genuine goodness, there's the good chance that that the other’s vision is going to diminish some of the things coming your way, and you don't perpetuate ugly behavior."
"Is there a measurable physiological response when you get angry?"
On fear: "What’s the emotion that drives pretenses? It’s very easy. Fear! The person who lives with pretenses is thinking, 'Well I’m threatened by the possibility of being seen threatened, of being seen as something other than wonderful. So, I’ve gotta keep up these false fronts because it’d be awful of people made a wrong interpretation of me.' The link to anger saw something else. Certainly the individual that drops the fear and learns to have a certain inner trust you know, it’s o.k.: To be what I am. Sometimes you’ll find that - 'I’m a mixed bag.' Sometimes I make wise decisions, sometimes I don’t. Drop the pretenses and learn to live without the fear. That’s where emotional cleanness starts to occur."
"There's nothing wrong with thinking, 'I’m a good guy who tries to go to work and help people.'"
"If you have a certain giftedness, I believe it’s wrong to hold that back. To not live in a forward way without using that gift in a forward way is not making good use of the life that’s been given you."
"Clara talked about pretenses – trying to pretend much more than you really are – you don’t have flaws, weaknesses or fears. There are lots of things you can do with a nice, moderate level of self-identity, not saying 'My underarms don’t stink, etc.'" :)
"Admit and acknowledge when you don’t have good moments!"
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